100 Days and the Dichotomy of Fellowship

Today marks 100 days that our family has left in Boston (counting down to July 30th when Brian's terminal vacation begins).  Within the past 2-3 weeks my focus has shifted from "just survive today and then tomorrow and someday (please dear God) let this winter will be over" to "oh my goodness, we must go and do or we'll run out of time before we move!"  This shift has everything to do with spring and all of Brian's upcoming vacation (we hoarded Brian's time off to use during spring and summer).  I'm looking forward to resuming the once a week "adventures" to new places that the kids and I do together.  We are excited to do more traveling around Boston and New England as a family. 

However, in the midst of this renewed excitement about our time in Boston, Brian and I are starting to look forward to life after fellowship.  It started with putting Brian's vacation schedule for his new job on the calendar.  He gets 3 WEEKS of vacation during the last five months of this year, which seems almost obscene when compared to what we've had every year for the past 5 years of residency and fellowship.  We've started dreaming about a couple's road trip during Brian's first week of vacation (grandparents, please note that it's the first week of September).  Brian's been trying to decide what car we should take.  I'm dreaming of days and days of freedom and fun and taking beautiful pictures.  Both of us are thinking about a fantastic route or destination for our trip. 

Then we go to church and I see our loving church family and think about having to leave them.  So many people in our church have embraced and loved our children, which immediately endeared them to Brian and me.  This church family has become so special to all of us in a way I never expected would happen this year.  I think of last Sunday, Palm Sunday, when we (the kids and a few adults) paraded around the auditorium waving our palms while the whole congregation sang two songs, one of which was picked specifically because its Nathan's favorite (Hosanna).  And I think about small groups, which both kids live for each week.  Almost daily there's a child that tries to convince me it's Sunday and that we'll be going to small groups in the evening.  I can just hear in my mind Sarah questioning the adults in church on Sunday morning "You come small groops?" to make sure they'll be there.  Both children are always eager to play with their friends, the "big kids" M and S. And then there was this morning's Easter service, where a main part of the service was involving the kids in the celebration of Jesus' resurrection and then of course the Easter egg hunt following the service.  Our church family has been such a blessing to us this year!

My feelings are so conflicted.  I'm excited about the now and I'm excited about the future.  I can't wait to move to Knoxville and start the next phase of our lives yet I'm sad about what we'll be leaving.

I've decided what it boils down to is this... I am thankful that I have so many things in my life to be excited about.  And I'm going to try to be mindful about living in the moment to make the most of these last 100 days.